"What do you DO all Day?!"
Juan had just taken Jack to look at trucks and tractors in the parking lot of the restaurant while the food was being made. A woman sitting at the next table chuckled as they walked away, leaning over saying, this is why we leave ours at home with his nanny. I laughed along and told her if only the food didn't take an age to make that boy wouldn't get so impatient.
We spent the next few moments talking about life in Rwanda, what brought us there and the adventures of having a toddler in such a different place than the USA. The convenience of nannies ;) Then I mentioned I didn't have one, and I stay home with Jack without working.
Jennifer (we were blessed to have the same name) looked at me a little surprised after my non nanny life confession and asked truly curiously, do you get bored? I mean, what do you guys do all day? OK, OK, US moms or moms that don't live in Rwanda, I have a confession for you too, I don't do laundry, iron, dishes, house cleaning, take out the garbage, or even handle many minor errands... there is someone else who does that for me, Theo. No, that isn't a secret name I call my husband. He is our house manager who manages the affairs of the house, from paying bills, to everything else I mentioned. So, her question is legit. And in Kigali there really aren't very many things to do.
I thought about this question today while Jack and I hung out in our cabin in Montana, and really...our life isn't much different here. I DO do laundry, but there is a dryer here, so really just add doing dishes and some house cleaning.
So WHAT DO we DO?
Well I'll tell you. Regardless of the country or person's house we are visiting we start every morning with "strawberry bread" or as most people would call it, toast. This strawberry bread tradition starts around 5:30AM It's the first request of the day, everyday.
7 to10AM we read books, build houses with blocks, make forts, and try ever so hard to make it to the toilet in time!
10 to 11AM Jack naps, I do projects. I'll put clothes in the wash, sew a dress that Jack will aid me in later by being my model :) or read a book. I do make my bed, that might happen here too. Or I might just take a nap with Jack.
12 to 4PM We have lunch, play with animals, (today we met a sweet black cat we love) reread books, play cars, and entertain locals
Awesomely, Grandpa Coltrin got J a little treat to help us play and have fun at the house here in Montana. Not just the playground set but enough cars and planes to last us the three months we are in the states!
5 to 7PM Jack and I normally play, watch movies with friends and make dinner. We just started cooking together since he learned how to stir without touching the pan :) And since moving back to the USA we've started doing dishes together too. Around 7 Jack asks if I can hold him, if we can brush teeth, pray and have milk. I listen to the book Juan and I reading, and then around 10 PM I (try to) head to bed. Then we start the whole thing again, 5:30 AM. There are variations for sure, but we make it up as we go.
Being a stay at home mom for me isn't the same as being home or not having a job. Aunt Kaye reminded me that as I visited her last week in Idaho. It's about what you do with your time and who you are doing it with. After thinking about that recently I reconsidered my own screen time, how I was interacting with Jack and how I'm showing him that he is loved, and worth my time. Joanne, my dad's wife told me about how there were some things her children could ask to do and no matter what she would drop whatever she was doing, and she help them with those specific things. Today I saw a few things I want to do same thing for. It won't be long until my little boy will stop asking me to hold him, to cuddle with him until he's asleep, to play cars and trains or ask if I'm coming along for some adventure. Every moment counts.
There are boring and hard parts too, times when I just want to sleep (part of being pregnant I hear) many of those times Jack will catch me getting in bed, or laying on the couch and quickly run over and scoot his little body next to me and just lay there for a moment. He's good to me.
Before becoming a mother I was worried I'd hate it, get bored or regret. Jeri, a coworker I admired for not just being an organized director in the UVU Alumni and Development Office, but for perusing her JD and doing so after having kids too, told me, "People will tell you it's the quality of time that matters more than the quantity of time that you spend with your kids. The trick is, you never know when that quality moment will happen, so you have to spend the quantity of time to be there for them when it does."
From the day Jack was born I never looked back. Our days forward were and are filled with diapers, potty training, toy cars, planes, outside discoveries to nights interrupted at midnight, 2 o'clock, and 4 o'clock for cuddles. It isn't everyone cup of tea, but it is ours. It's how we spend our time.
We spent the next few moments talking about life in Rwanda, what brought us there and the adventures of having a toddler in such a different place than the USA. The convenience of nannies ;) Then I mentioned I didn't have one, and I stay home with Jack without working.
Jennifer (we were blessed to have the same name) looked at me a little surprised after my non nanny life confession and asked truly curiously, do you get bored? I mean, what do you guys do all day? OK, OK, US moms or moms that don't live in Rwanda, I have a confession for you too, I don't do laundry, iron, dishes, house cleaning, take out the garbage, or even handle many minor errands... there is someone else who does that for me, Theo. No, that isn't a secret name I call my husband. He is our house manager who manages the affairs of the house, from paying bills, to everything else I mentioned. So, her question is legit. And in Kigali there really aren't very many things to do.
I thought about this question today while Jack and I hung out in our cabin in Montana, and really...our life isn't much different here. I DO do laundry, but there is a dryer here, so really just add doing dishes and some house cleaning.
So WHAT DO we DO?
 |
| Breakfast at Aunt Kaye's |
Well I'll tell you. Regardless of the country or person's house we are visiting we start every morning with "strawberry bread" or as most people would call it, toast. This strawberry bread tradition starts around 5:30AM It's the first request of the day, everyday.
7 to10AM we read books, build houses with blocks, make forts, and try ever so hard to make it to the toilet in time!10 to 11AM Jack naps, I do projects. I'll put clothes in the wash, sew a dress that Jack will aid me in later by being my model :) or read a book. I do make my bed, that might happen here too. Or I might just take a nap with Jack.
12 to 4PM We have lunch, play with animals, (today we met a sweet black cat we love) reread books, play cars, and entertain locals
Awesomely, Grandpa Coltrin got J a little treat to help us play and have fun at the house here in Montana. Not just the playground set but enough cars and planes to last us the three months we are in the states!
5 to 7PM Jack and I normally play, watch movies with friends and make dinner. We just started cooking together since he learned how to stir without touching the pan :) And since moving back to the USA we've started doing dishes together too. Around 7 Jack asks if I can hold him, if we can brush teeth, pray and have milk. I listen to the book Juan and I reading, and then around 10 PM I (try to) head to bed. Then we start the whole thing again, 5:30 AM. There are variations for sure, but we make it up as we go.
Being a stay at home mom for me isn't the same as being home or not having a job. Aunt Kaye reminded me that as I visited her last week in Idaho. It's about what you do with your time and who you are doing it with. After thinking about that recently I reconsidered my own screen time, how I was interacting with Jack and how I'm showing him that he is loved, and worth my time. Joanne, my dad's wife told me about how there were some things her children could ask to do and no matter what she would drop whatever she was doing, and she help them with those specific things. Today I saw a few things I want to do same thing for. It won't be long until my little boy will stop asking me to hold him, to cuddle with him until he's asleep, to play cars and trains or ask if I'm coming along for some adventure. Every moment counts.There are boring and hard parts too, times when I just want to sleep (part of being pregnant I hear) many of those times Jack will catch me getting in bed, or laying on the couch and quickly run over and scoot his little body next to me and just lay there for a moment. He's good to me.
Before becoming a mother I was worried I'd hate it, get bored or regret. Jeri, a coworker I admired for not just being an organized director in the UVU Alumni and Development Office, but for perusing her JD and doing so after having kids too, told me, "People will tell you it's the quality of time that matters more than the quantity of time that you spend with your kids. The trick is, you never know when that quality moment will happen, so you have to spend the quantity of time to be there for them when it does."
From the day Jack was born I never looked back. Our days forward were and are filled with diapers, potty training, toy cars, planes, outside discoveries to nights interrupted at midnight, 2 o'clock, and 4 o'clock for cuddles. It isn't everyone cup of tea, but it is ours. It's how we spend our time.
