The Awkward Truth

For some it happened in high school, some middle school, and the lucky ones, in toddlerhood. But for me the infamous awkward phase was in college and even a few years after.

I like to blame it on graduating early, my nerdy focus on biology, my hermit-like behavior as a teen seemed to postponed my awkward phase up until the moment that should have been my finest college hours! (then again maybe I always going through the phase)…Regardless! it happened, and as I approach my 30^th birthday I finally accept this, not to cringe in shame, thinking of the patient adults and role models I humiliated myself in front of, but rather to get a good, chuckle. 

You might be tempted to think I’m exaggerating, but lest you think I’m joking. Here, for your entertainment and humor, I share my finest moments of awkward selfness.

First week of college, walking home from school, I caught sight of our university president heading to his car. While the school did hold a reception for new students to meet him, I had missed it. I knew that right then and there could be a real game-changer for me. I might never get the chance to meet him again! I ran with my backpack bouncing to get to him before he reached his car, and just missed him! Luckily the car was still parked.

Split second decision -- knock on the window or just give up?

Meh…I’d never see him again, plus, he’d never remember me anyway. Before the president could even turn his key I rapped on his window and caught him completely off guard. He rolled down the window, and I made my BIG introduction…

 “Hi! I know someone from your home state…”

And that was it! My shinning moment…sure it was brief, but at least it drove home the point that I did have connection.

Little did I know I’d end up working in an office right next to his and see him nearly every day for the next 2 years.

Same man...take two!

It had been 3-4 years since that first lovely encounter and we had plenty more. He was giving a fireside, or was it a conference? I don’t remember. I was so excited to see him because he had slowly become a role model in my life. At the end of it all, I went right up to say hi…but that was not enough for me! No, I had spent pivotal years in Rexburg and this man had influenced the college I knew and loved. I was going big…or going home, so I asked him straight up if I could give him a hug.

There was silence…and then a He calmly said, “no”. Not in a harsh or rude manner, just no...

I was devastated! I wasn’t swallowing my pride at this point, but rather choking on it! As I turned to leave, he called to me and said “don’t be offended”. I replied shamefully that I wasn’t offended, just scared. and that was that!

He may have given a talk soon after about how we can choose to not be offended.

These past few days I’ve seen a lot of posts about - what not to post - for April Fool’s day and how vital it is to not offend others. While I agree we should be sensitive to others, I argue that we should also be slow to take offense, and to choose to not be offended.

I think about that phrase “we choose to be offended” often. In every argument I have come to realize it is more or less because someone took offense, when often, offense was never the intent.

Today, while I was out-n-about with Jack door-knocking and meeting neighbors, I got in a conversation with Curtis (neighbor 2 doors down) he casually asked what we were doing here in Texas and I told him about Juan’s master’s degree, yada yada and he summed up my life with, “Oh cool, so you hang out every day with Jack?”. I owned it proudly, “Yup! Just me and my buddy”.

Minutes later, Curtis ran into me again and started apologizing. He said he hoped he didn’t offend me, and to know he had the highest regard for stay-at-home moms. He told me his mom was one as well and he didn’t mean to put me down at all. I hadn’t even thought of it that way! But thanked him and let him know no harm was done. The words left my mouth before I thought them through, “ya know, a friend of mine taught me that we choose to be offended”.  He smiled, and now we're friends.

Thanks Elder Bednar;)
Jenn